Acquaint By Numbers

Ever just follow random links out of boredom?

Me too...although normally it only takes about three
clicks before you end up on some porn site or other.

Yesterday, I was clicking away on hyperlinks and ended up
on a Numerology website and got to reading.

I do read my horoscope most days although I don't put
a whole lot of stock in it. It has become more of a habit
than a belief - something to do between the editorial page
and the comics.

I learned to read tarot cards years ago, have done my
share of scrying, and take more than a passing interest
in palmistry. The desire to understand the past, be aware
of the present and glimpse the future is an inborn trait
for me...and I'm sure I'm not alone.

Anyway, numerology.

I know a few people who are right into this stuff and
swear by it's accuracy. Numbers, they say, are no
accident. Everything has a sum - and when all things
are added up, patterns become visible.

So finding myself on this numerology site, I couldn't
help but enter my information to see what my personal
calculations said about me.

I was impressed for the most part. Much like my astrological
sign descriptions (Capricorn), I saw myself in much of what this
numerology report said. There were a few aspects I found a
little laughable, but by and large, it was pretty close.

If you know me personally, click on the numbers box and see
what you think.

If you don't know me on a personal level...feel free to click and
find out if you want to get to know me better.

Incidentally, any cracks about my hyphenated birth name or my
maiden name will earn you swift retribution....(that's part of who
I am too =P )

Rules is Rules

Isn't it great when you have the day off, your friends
have the day off, and you try to decide what to do?

Please, for the love of all that is holy...plan something
in advance.

Anything.

Hours spent drinking coffee while playing the 'I dunno... what do you wanna do' game is frustrating, boring and
wastes valuable time. Usually by the time a consensus
is reached, it's 8:00 pm and the day has been utterly
spent.

Go get a manicure together. See a movie. Shoot some
pool. Go shopping...something!!

It's either that - or resort to

(insert scary music here__________)

The Rules...



Click the comic for bigishness

XKCD

Fruit Ballad

I hate to do this so often, but I'm one of those people
who firmly believes that misery loves company.

Come...keep me company.
You know you want to.

If you are brave enough (and need a good laugh),
please click on the picture below to hear a song that
is cute, stupid, and terribly contagious.

Sing it to your friends...see how long they stay your friends.

Incidentally, this was introduced to me by a co-worker
who sings it everytime he passes me (which over the course
of my day amounts to about 20 times or more).

I love him...and hate him too.

(nothing but love, Giuseppi...nothing but love!)

Spring Careening

Ah, Spring!

The sun is getting brighter, the days a little
longer...and no matter where you go, you cannot
escape the smell of thawing dogshit.

As much as I am glad winter is over, the arrival
of Spring brings so many annoyances with it.

Here are just a few:

Bicyclists. Sorry - I'm not a bike person. If you
can't obey the rules of the road, then your bike
is not a vehicle, it's a toy. And toys belong
in the yard.

Skateboarders. Die. All of you. Now.
The sidewalk is not a half-pipe, bus stop benches
are not for jumping and railings are for hands - not
your damned skateboards!

Rollerbladers. You can die too. Take your fancy-
shmancy dance moves to the nightclub and get off the
damned sidewalk.

Joggers. Nike vs. Michelin - need I say more?

Please don't get me wrong. I have no problem with
any of the above activities in and of themselves. I
just hate it when they interfere with MY attempts to
get somewhere...especially when I'm driving.

I drive a very large vehicle - and I have no qualms
whatsoever about taking any one of you out with it.
I will sleep well at night, comfortable in the knowledge
that I did my part to better the community.

...

The previous post was for one person in particular.

Judging from the emails that I received today, it has
come to my attention that I have several friends in need
of support and/or comfort.

Of course that message was for you.

...and you too.

To Whom It May Concern

It's going to work out...

Maybe not right away - there are undoubtedly hard
times ahead.

You're going to be okay.

I promise.




I won't give up if you don't give up...

The Wearing o' the Green

St. Patrick's Day...Faith and Begorah!! Let us all get
shitfaced drunk on green beer and do silly jigs like
overgrown hobbits on meth.

Surely this is the legacy the proud Irish
intended to pass along to the rest of the world.

Riiiiiiiiiiiight.

Drink...get drunk...fall down...get back up...hit someone...
(preferably a stranger, but a friend will do)...drink some more.

And don't forget your silly fake accent! Jesus-Mary-n-the Saints, ya
canna' be heard speaking today without a rich Irish brogue!

Which brings me to this:



Someday, the Irish will kill us all in our sleep.
And we'll deserve it.